Those feelings are understandable, particularly given some of the messages you may have received about this. To match they raised the humiliation to more nudity, sometimes naked or allowed just a bra...or more humiliating positions like all 4's on the bed, the diaper position, grabbing ankles and spreading legs apart...and also doing more spankings in the kitchen, living room or other places where my siblings would also see them. The humiliation included staying in positions after the spanking ended for a period of time and them talking openly about my spankings with their friends. There were times when I was made to show the marks to their friends and plenty of times when they allowed other people to spank me. As ever, the "why" question can't be answered. And as ever, Emily and I talked it out and decided to explore the local spanking community together, hand in hand. We took our first step on an October night, when we parked on a quiet Austin street at dusk and headed towards the sound of clinking glasses and gentle laughter. According to an article in The Journal of Sex Research, people may engage in spanking therapy for a range of reasons, such as :

I’m a straight guy but my whole life I have wanted to be spanked by older men. Does this make any sense? Because I’m confused. I don’t like or want penis, yet I want to be spanked as a punishment by men. I don’t understand myself sometimes. —Sincerely Pondering And Not Knowing You are my wife. I love you, I love you way too much to allow you to disregard our agreement on the best way for you to improve your health and put yourself in jeopardy. I care enough about you to put some boundaries and guidelines around you to keep you safe. And yes I will wear you out if necessary to show you just how serious I am about my love for you.” I ended up meeting with this guy that I knew a few times,as he was into the whole thing too & we'd meet just so that he could give me the spankings that I craved,& Desperately wanted & Needed. It worked out,he liked dishing out & I loved taking it! After years of knowing that she has this need, your wife/girlfriend/lover finally told you she wants to be spanked. I am guessing that at best you were surprised especially if you have been together twenty years or more. You may think it’s a passing whim. You may think it is just a random fantasy that has run through her mind; something best left as a fantasy not something she would like in real life. Plus you love this woman and you have no desire to hurt her. A 2019 study looked at how Canadian university students thought about BDSM practices, with 60% of male participants and 31% of female participants having positive thoughts about whipping or spanking. Where can a person learn more about spanking therapy?Answer: HELL YES they hurt! I can understand how the term “consensual” might lead one to believe that I consent only up to the point where it really starts becoming painful, then I can opt out citing I no longer consent to the spanking/pain. But what I’ve consented to (and continue to consent to), are real consequences by way of real domestic discipline spankings from my wife. The fact that I take what is given, is consenting on my part because I’m never tied or restrained in any way. So I COULD stand up and stop it at any time and say, “I don’t want to take this anymore”. But the moment I do that, then it isn’t a real spanking, is it?

One-quarter (27%) said their preferred pain propelled them into a trance-like altered state involving deep relaxation, almost mystical contentment, a sensation of floating outside their bodies achieving oneness with the universe. Subs have a word for this—“subspace.” “It’s meditative.” “I feel all floaty and spacey.” “I go on ‘vacation’ mentally to a place where I feel everything but nothing hurts.”BDSM is never abusive. Because of negotiated agreements and safewords, no matter how it looks, BDSM is always friendly, affectionate, and for many players, deeply nurturing.

All the Spankos I’ve interviewed since joining the scene tell similar stories. The first professional spanker I went to said he told his mother when he was around ten that he was going to spank his wife when he got married. Most, both spankers and spankees, had these feelings from an early age. Some were spanked as children, and some had never been spanked. What we all have in common is the deep desire and near craving for it. Over the next several months she spanked my regularly. The spankings were something I tried to avoid as they invariably left marks and made it uncomfortable to sit for a day or two. She was right, abuse had nothing to do with the fun that my wife and I watched. All we saw was openness and acceptance, a group in which a professional woman can go over the knee of a handsome man (and vice versa, actually) and everyone is happy for both of them. As for whether it will come out of the closet, time will tell. In the meantime, if you hear a clapping sound and a few squeals and giggles emanating from the neighbor's place, there's a decent chance they're not watching sports.You could fill it out together, comparing answers as you go, or fill it out separately then compare your answers. In the meantime, I’m grateful she’s been so game. Later at the dinner party, our naughty server Melanie dropped a dessert spoon into my lap, and it was too symbolic to ignore. So yes, I spanked her. And my darling wife raised Melanie's crisp little skirt for me.

Individuals may find it provides a new experience and a release from their everyday selves and responsibilities. Why might people like being spanked? De Neef., et al. (2019). Bondage-discipline, dominance-submission and sadomasochism (BDSM) from an integrative biopsychosocial perspective: A systematic review. When he says "It's over" or "Stand up", stand with grace and pride. You've been punished. You've taken it with respect and dignity.Spanking is one of those fetishes that has fans ranging from lovers who are vanilla all the way to extreme BDSM players. Most people enjoy a slap or two on the behind. Others like to receive a few spanks during intercourse doggy style. BDSM proponents, of course, take it further, sometimes involving whips and chains. For Spankos, it’s all about the pain in the derriere. There’s an aspect of relinquishing control in the last two groups, which adds to the pleasure. It’s all fine as long as it’s consensual, which may be written or verbal. This is about your recent response to UNCUT, the guy who met men who believed they were uncut when they were very much cut. You suggested that these men were lying about being uncircumcised. But not knowing might be more common than we assume. This is from Epidemiology , the authoritative textbook written by Leon Gordis of the Johns Hopkins School of Public Health: “They asked a group of men whether or not they had been circumcised. The men were then examined by a physician. Of the 56 men who stated they were circumcised, 19, or 33.9 percent, were found to be uncircumcised. Of the 136 men who stated they were not circumcised, 47, or 34.6 percent, were found to be circumcised. These data demonstrate that the findings from studies using interview data may not always be clear-cut.” —Some Truly Are Thrown At times, spanking was an obsession, and one made all the more torturous for the shame I felt harboring it. For more than 20 years I thought there was something wrong with me. I thought that if, by chance, someone else felt the same way, then they'd be a dirty old man with a grubby overcoat and bulging eyes. But I couldn't help it. I didn't choose to be kinky in this way, any more than a man or woman chooses to be straight or gay. The way I saw it, homosexuals had their closet and I had mine. Only mine was a lot smaller, and I was the only one in it. When I was 21, right after I graduated from college, I began dating Brandon, a brilliant, charismatic, confident 22-year-old. I loved how his dominant, even arrogant, personality manifested itself between the sheets. (Really, the only place I could put up with such a personality.) I didn’t have to ask for him to spank or dominate me because he did it naturally, and I didn’t feel like I was “choosing” to be submissive. But when we broke up after nine months, I knew I wanted the next guy I dated to be dominant in bed, like Brandon had been. I did a little Googling about submission and spanking fetishes and discovered it was a lot of other people’s fetishes, as well. You could say I was in denial about my spanking fetish. It wasn’t that I thought slapping booty was abuse, nor was my starched WASP upbringing to blame. No, the problem was my feminist sensibilities. I realize now that the term “feminism” is vague and means different things for different people, but when I was younger, I assumed there was a way a feminist should think and act. So, even though I liked the feeling of getting spanked, I felt conflicted about giving up my physical power, thinking spanking wasn’t something an independent and opinionated woman should enjoy. Just how, I fretted, could a partner take me seriously as a thinker, a doer, and a creator when I wanted to be submissive to him? What if people think I’m weird or screwed up?