Abused, Used, and Abandoned—Now Valued and Loved: A True Story

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Abused, Used, and Abandoned—Now Valued and Loved: A True Story

Abused, Used, and Abandoned—Now Valued and Loved: A True Story

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Character assassination. This usually involves the word “always.” You’re always late, wrong, screwing up, disagreeable, and so on. They might say these things to you, or use them to describe your behavior to others. Blaming you for their problems. When things go wrong, they always blame you. If only you’d been a more loving child, a more supportive partner, or a better parent, they might say, their life would be fantastic. take your time, slow down: Respect pauses and don’t interrupt the child – let them go at their own pace. Recognise and respond to their body language. And remember that it may take several conversations for them to share what’s happened to them. It's not always easy to spot the signs of abuse. Someone being abused may make excuses for why they're bruised, may not want to go out or talk to people, or may be short of money. The debate around BDSM – whether it is harmful and violent or consensual fun – remains contentious.

Yelling. Screaming, yelling, and swearing can intimidate you and make you feel small and inconsequential. Maybe they never hit you, but they do pound their fist, throw things, or damage property. The incidents of physical abuse have only occurred one or two times in the relationship. Studies indicate that if your partner has injured you once, it is likely that they'll continue to assault you.Read: Emotional and Psychological Trauma] Economic or financial abuse: A subtle form of emotional abuse Fantasy and planning – Your abuser begins to fantasize about repeating the abuse. They spend a lot of time thinking about what you've done wrong and how they'll make you pay for it. Then they form a plan for turning the fantasy of abuse into reality. A man abuses his partner. After he hits her, he experiences self-directed guilt. He says, “I'm sorry for hurting you.” What he does not say is, “Because I might get caught.”

We carried out research to find out how adults can better respond to a child who is disclosing abuse (Baker et al, 2019). We found three key interpersonal skills that help a child feel they are being listened to and taken seriously: Follow your organisation’s safeguarding policies and procedures as soon as possible. These should provide clear guidelines on the steps you need to take if a child discloses abuse. They will state who in your organisation has responsibility for safeguarding or child protection and who you should report your concerns to. Domestic abuse includes sexual assault, non-sexual abuse and stalking by a partner or family member. The CSEW defines domestic abuse as occurring after the age of 16. People of any age or gender can abuse or experience abuse. And abuse doesn’t just happen in the context of romantic relationships. The person abusing you could be your spouse or romantic partner — but they might also be your business partner, parent, caretaker, or even your adult child.

Childline

If you or your organisation made a referral to the local authority, that local authority must assess the concern alongside other information. If the local authority makes the decision that action should be taken, a meeting will take place to identify how local agencies can work together to safeguard the child or young person. Department of Health, Social Services and Public Safety (DHSSPS) (2012) Code of practice on protecting the confidentiality of service user information. [Belfast]: DHSSPS. Department of Health (2021) Guidance on information sharing for child protection purposes. [Accessed 07/09/2021].​ support them as a friend, encourage them to express their feelings, and allow them to make their own decisions



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