Most comments I’ve heard about the region from outsiders is just harmless banter, usually about how we drink a lot and are immune to the cold. I for one don’t sing those songs but I’m not outraged by them, I just don’t think they are either clever or original, not particularly funny and most importantly it isn’t really related to supporting your own team. The majority – loyal, faithful, hard-working, cash-strapped Newcastle fans – desperately wanted it to work; longed to see McClaren mould talented players into a mean top-half of the table team; to see the club at least achieve SAFETY.

The first man set off, but … QUACK QUACK … he stood on a duck’s foot, and a horrible old woman with a hunch back was waiting for him ! You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie preferences, as described in the Cookie notice.By purchasing the item from Charlies Chapters Ltd you agree that you are happy to receive a revised edition. You can reach our highly engaged audience and work with us to create entertaining and engaging content that focuses on telling not selling. If you’ve ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex GirlNewfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Newcastle United jokes is for you.

Every Sunderland supporter knows what a joke the Magpies really are and so do most people up and down the country. The taxi driver, who sees hundreds of different people every day, smiles politely and replies "Maybe. On the way back she drove the car into the first available layby, undid his zipper and proceeded to perform an erotic act on him.Bob Moncur should fall on his sword NOW and admit his backing for McClaren was wrong, and propping up Lee Charnley’s ailing board was worse.

Suddenly, a member of the public stops him, and says, "I recognise you from somewhere, are you famous?We don’t share your credit card details with third-party sellers, and we don’t sell your information to others. He also noticed that one of the workers was using his false teeth to seal and make patterns around the edges of the pies. You stupid bugger, Geordie’ he shouted ‘THEY USE THE CAMELS FOR RIDING INTO TOWN TO MEET THE GIRLS !

Geordie’s wife bought a piglet in the pub, and staggered home, where Geordie was watching the tellie. Until it occurred to me -- maybe "Newcastle" in this anecdote was Newcastle-under-Lyme, located about an hour from Liverpool and more or less on the way to/from London! Well, the Beatles in their early career were said to have had days when they drove from Liverpool to London to do a recording session, then drove to Newcastle to play a show that night, then drove back to Liverpool and got up the next morning to do a similar routine. A thief has broken into Newcastle United's trophy room where their precious MFI made trophy cabinet proudly stands.Mike Feary, from Bedlington: During the Wear Tyne Derby at the Stadium of Light, a 50p piece was thrown onto the pitch during the match,Sunderland’s board are still trying to decide if it was a missile or a takeover bid. For the record too, Newcastle fans have done so much for charity, especially in terms of the amazing work that goes on by NUFC FoodBank, and the fundraising, via Gallowgate Flags, that goes to the beneficiaries. He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Newcastle United supporter. The Newcastle United Fan brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! It's not exactly a beautiful city, but there are some really impressive views along the Tyne with its succession of bridges at different levels.