To know that I could finally come clean to my worrisome friends felt liberating beyond belief. I didn’t care about sacrificing my youth to move to outer London with a swarm of forty-somethings. All I wanted was to be with her full-time, and for it to be out in the open that we were together. She wanted to take me home. So strange. She told me her house is a very interesting place. But then we talked for so long she couldn’t do it, and had to rush to a meeting. She wanted to give me a ride I didn’t really need. She dropped me at a stop. Bu we stayed longer together. She dropped me at another bus station which was also convenient for me, but it still allowed us more time. We ate the chocolates together. And as we dug in the box together, I felt her fingers on mine. Doesn’t she know what a lesbian can feel? Is she one and is attracted to me and that’s why she’s getting closer? Is she one but thinks I am way too young and so treats me like a buddy/kid? I don’t know. I am 30 and I am not the eternal teenager type. Perhaps she can’t help being attracted even though she thinks I’m too young for her. Her husband reacted surprisingly well too, suggesting that they enrol in therapy to help both of them exit their long-standing relationship. I took this as my cue to make a commitment and said I would move to the suburbs to be with her and her three children, once her husband had moved out. I’ve never been with older women before, but I know I can be attracted to whoever is attractive. Since I am a 30-old lesbian who came out at 18/19. I was very much aware of what I was doing as I worked harder and harder to impress her. I also worked harder because she relieved me: She had just arrived in that department and was so smart and skilled compared to the people I had worked with before. So for all these reasons, I loved being around her.

I’m 30 and 4 months ago I met an older woman, who is the topic of this true story I would like to share today. This woman and I have worked in an organization as volunteers. As soon as I met her, I loved her skills, her personality, her face, everything. She was the kind of woman you look up to when you’re young and you tell yourself, ‘If that means getting older, then I am not afraid to die.’ She could be my mother as they say, but she’s not, and as a lesbian, I was immediately attracted.I wondered if she was a lesbian. Not because I was interested in her, but because I had doubts. I heard she had a grandson. Now I know she got married at 20, and had two kids. It doesn’t prove or mean anything. But I didn’t hope for anything either, because let’s face it, she’s probably not a lesbian and even if she was, I am a baby to her.

There's a slow and persistent burn in Mona Fastvold's The World to Come. The gorgeously spare period piece stars Katherine Waterston ( Alien: Covenant) as Abigail and Vanessa Kirby ( The Crown) as Tallie, two women battling the harsh elements in 19th-century New York State who find solace and a whole lot more in one another. Since then, we’ve talked on the phone. For an hour, then an hour and a half. Then we met for coffee, and talked for 3 and a half hours. More than half a century after Patricia Highsmith's groundbreaking 1952 novel The Price of Salt/Carol was released, Todd Haynes's big-screen adaptation Carol became revolutionary in its own way. The film, starring Cate Blanchett as the titular Carol, a soon-to-be-divorced New Jersey socialite and mother who falls for Rooney Mara's Therese, the shopgirl who is, as Carol notes, "flung out of space," earned six Oscar nominations, even if it was snubbed in the Best Picture category. Still, it was the first Oscar-worthy love story about a female couple in which a man does not steal focus and that doesn't end in disaster or death for the women. In fact, the novel and the film's hopeful ending offers a possible happily-ever-after for Carol and Therese.Part revenge tale and part redemption song, Lizzie took years for indie darling Chloe Sevigny ( Boys Don't Cry, Big Love, Love and Friendship) and out writer Bryce Kass to shepherd to the screen. Although there were several iterations along the way, the final version of the film about the ax killer from the tiny town of Fall River, Mass., couldn't have come at a timelier moment. A film that shares a lineage with the queer true crime-based films of the '90s like Heavenly Creatures and Sister My Sister, Lizzie is a fresh take on the "murderous lesbians'" trope. The movie also fits right in with the #MeToo era, with Lizzie and her maid/love interest/co-conspirator Bridget (Kristen Stewart) literally bashing toxic masculinity in the face. She is not nervous or awkward or excessive. She’s mature and calm. She’s in control. But there’s something very ambiguous about her: I still feel like this woman isn’t straight. Plus, I am never attracted to straight women, and with her I keep feeling bewitched. Her eyes, the way she gazes. She smiles. Does she have any idea that she makes me tremble inside? She knows she’s attractive. She has short white hair, an incredible face and honey-colored eyes. Her mouth hypnotizes me, when she talks, and when she’s quiet her personality makes her irresistible. Her sense of humor, her plain style, her nice clothes, but mostly the way she moves and talks. Then something funny happened. The music was playing, the coffee shop was empty, and suddenly, for some obscure reason, the owner turned down the lights. … It was suddenly cozy and romantic… And she looked as embarassed and surprised as I. As I was speaking about myself, she was looking at me with honey in her eyes. Is that how an older woman looks on a cute young woman chatting and stuff? Why does it make me melt?

I know maybe I should say something. But I’d also love to be friends. I know I can be just friends if that’s all there is. She’s a smart and generous woman. I wonder if one day I say to her, ‘You know, when you do that, it turns me on …I feel something…’, she will understand. And perhaps that might bring out the truth. The film chronicles Colette's rise to fame as she leaves behind her country upbringing to become the toast of Paris along with her husband, Willy (Dominic West), who spurs her to chronicle her life for his literary factory where only his moniker appears on everything that's published.The women, experiencing stirrings of feminist thought without a vocabulary to express them as well as a desire for each other, find intellectual and emotional support on afternoons when their husbands are away. In the office, nothing changed. Both of us swore not to tell anyone else. I dodged questions from friends about my relationship status like bullets - the lies were worth it for the delirium I felt when I was with her. Colette, about the trailblazing writer Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette, who engaged in relationships with men, women, and trans-masculine-identifying people circa the Belle Epoque, is queer to its core. In the film directed by Wash Westmoreland, who is gay, Keira Knightley embodies the pansexual bohemian feminist who stepped out of her husband's shadow to become the most famous female French author in the world. It's more than a kind of first love. It's a first everything: first friendship, first real companion, intellectual companion. There's a trust from the first moment they look at each other, that this person understands me. And in a way that they've never had before," Waterston tells The Advocate. Lesbian Awakenings: Trisha's Story (Part One): Trisha is bored; her husband works long hours and is constantly away on business trips. When he's home, he isn't interested in her. To spice things up, Trisha decides to take some pictures of herself and put them online. This leads to an encounter with a stranger online who unleashes a hidden passion Trisha didn't know she had.