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Norpro Nut Chopper

Norpro Nut Chopper

RRP: £99
Price: £9.9
£9.9 FREE Shipping

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Description

How many times did I zap his balls? I forget, but it was many times. The air in the room smelled like ozone and burning when I was done. This last Christmas an opportunity presented itself, with a clearly half ball-mad submissive boy suggested I do whatever I like with his balls, which is always a good start. So after I bang your worthless family stones out of the beating-hole in the table, they’re at least as big and soft as a couple of goddamned canned peaches, it’s time to start crushing the juice out of them. Here, again, there are so many fun and worthwhile different ways to crush them properly… Pestle and mortar: Made up of a heavy bowl (mortar) and a club-shaped tool (pestle), this is a primitive and centuries-old means of grinding spices and other foods. These come in a range of sizes, from small ones no bigger than a teacup to large Mexican molcajete. Pestle and mortars are versatile as both dry and wet mixes can be ground in them. But when it comes to chopping more than a handful, it can be timeconsuming, especially if you don’t have good knife skills. But there is a better way to chop almonds, walnuts, peanuts, and a variety of other nuts – the nut chopper!

I hear this sort of request from a lot of guys. So much more than you’d think. If I was a silly boy as well as a completely depraved ball-pervert like you, I’d say I want to experience total nut agony, but that’s so easy to do and you don’t even have to come near ball-popping stresses to get that. But alas, when one of these boys says to destroy them, it’s sometimes really hard to pass up an opportunity like that. So I am known to oblige. It’s endless fun to see how much those big balls of fun can take, the only bad part is when I have to stop. When you get zapped by electricity, the tissues in your body offers very little resistance to the electrons flowing through them. That pain is every neuron the electrons touch, telling your brain how unpleasant it is to be a conductor of electricity. It’s also potentially damaging your cells at a microscopic level, so those neurons are screaming at your brain, MAKE THIS STOP! To make things easier, you can soak the hard nuts in water for a while before chopping to soften them.

Buyer’s Guide

Finished? Did it hurt? Of course it did. But, that was nothing compared to what I do. It’s important for you to do these exercises I recommend, for reference. And also because it’s good for your ball-pain craving mind.

Nut choppers are just like any regular chopper – be it electrical or manual. It has a container to hold the ingredients and blades to chop it off. So they can be used for chopping other things as well, including some vegetables, cheeses, bacon, and more. Can I use a coffee grinder for chopping nuts? For you, wave after increasing wave of nausea assaults you as you struggle in and out of consciousness. It’s not pretty, and usually at this point I’ll start to untie you. I don’t want you drowning in ballpuke or something sordid like that. I am a nice lady after all. In case you don’t know, an elastrator is a tool used to “harmlessly” castrate farm animals. The great thing about it is it cuts off the blood supply super easily, which immobilises the unfortunate male animal. Even a human can’t remove the bands without a knife. Spice mill: Like the pestle and mortar, a spice mill is manual. These have a similar design to a pepper mill in that the device is hand-cranked and the ground spices come out of the bottom. They’re a great option if you’re looking to grind small amounts. Spice mills are not suitable for wet ingredients. The best way to make sure I really ‘go to town’ on your balls is to make sure you’re completely bound and gagged. That way you can’t change your mind or try to yell out annoying words. The best you can muster is a weak-ass “Ftop! Fleafe! Ftop!”. Welp, I’m sorry bud but I don’t speak whatever language that is!

FAQs

Anyway, there are as many ways to completely bind and gag a nut-perv as your imagination can allow, but the main thing is that I abuse the testicles absolutely mercilessly, to get them to the proper point of sensitivity and take them to their absolute limits of ruination. When you beat them for half an hour and they’ve swollen anywhere from 50% to 200% that’s when they’re just right for comfortable full weight ball standing! Err yes, comfortable for me, not you. They’re like a big old spongey fluffy pillow down there for me to relax my feet on… There have been a fair few studies done about human testicles by mostly male scientists who are very concerned about what the maximum force allowable is before testicles rupture. According to a peer-reviewed study for sports health, “a 50 lbs force or 222 newtons is needed to rupture the protective outer tunica albuginea of direct force. The testicle ruptures when force is applied through the organ that is “trapped” against the pelvis bone, protective cup, or inner thigh.” I had forgot to set a timer at the beginning so I had no idea how long I’d been playing with his nuts by now. Whoops! So, I decided to release him. Do you just want to chop nuts or grind or both? How fine or coarse do you like your chopped nuts? The last thing you want is a nut chopper that doesn’t do what you want.

I jammed the cattle prod/taser into the heart of his dumb, oxygen starved, under pressure balls and pulled the trigger, sending 4000 volts into his body through his testes. He jerked and screamed, and screamed and screamed. I was laughing my head off, but seriously boy, shut up, you’re embarrassing yourself. Another way is full-weight ball standing. Sadly, I have yet to get a boy to consent to me filming that, nonetheless it’s so much fun to do! I’ve even done it whilst taking a shower! Talk about effortless. I couldn’t be bothered to deal with taking off the elastrator band, since that’s kind of difficult and I’d rather him accidentally cut his balls with the scissors than me.

The cool thing about this vice is that it has clear plastic on one side so I can see his balls getting more and more crushed. Normally I like to crush them so they’re flat, like big white and purple pancakes, but the elastrator is fighting against the vice and their shape isn’t deforming like usual. I try to crush the balls even harder than normal but they’re just not getting as flat as I’d like. If I filmed these kinda events, it would be for some kinda boring viewing. You’d just see a guy on the floor looking all pathetic and me getting more and more bored waiting for him to recover LOL, so the idea is to create videos that are entertaining, and with an experimental element of “What’s going to happen?” because we try lots of new things together on camera, and find out! 😊 I beat his balls with some hard punches and slaps to get them a bit swollen and wake them up some. He’s being a bit loud, so I cover his face with a pillow. Next up we have the lemon squeezer, a personal favourite of mine. I love this because they make it so easy to squeeze guy’s nutmeat. It’s like they were designed to be used on balls! The leverage I get from just an absolutely tiny bit of applied force causes absolutely mind-bending agony (that’s what it looks like). Just watch one of my ballbois trapped in my lemon squeezer for literally a few seconds, making his voice involuntarily rises two octaves to almost a squeak as he pleads desperately for mercy. Can a girl even have any more fun than that?! He never agreed to ball-death so unfortunately I decide to stop, but not before he veritably screams the safe-word at me, not once, but twice before I let him free. Trust me, I know what a testiball can take, so shut up and take it. I’ll let you know when I’m finished. (Also no joke but lots of guys end up saying the safeword and then afterwards they were like “I didn’t mean it”– that’s confusing!!) So anyway, where were we? Ah yes, the different ways to crush testicles. I have a few. One is with a vice thats specifically made for squishing balls flat, like ugly little pancakes. Mechanical, effective, and so extremely painful that professional torturers have used them for Millenia to extract information from unfortunate males. A wonderful way to go, except it’s still kinda hard to make them pop in there.



  • Fruugo ID: 258392218-563234582
  • EAN: 764486781913
  • Sold by: Fruugo

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